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One Pill, Two Pill

The time was CD’s, Eminem and infant internet. I am so sorry – to all of you! I lost myself and became so selfish in my search for normality, I just wanted to be like you so much I found a medication that could make me “Sane” But I would have lost my talent to write as it switches wires within my brain, so to speak. But my dream out-weighed my addiction and now I am back, with the greatest of apologies to all of my readers!

Forgive Me!

Chain me to this black cloud; I am hiding what I have done to myself behind my shackles. The lure of darkness has my eye and the shadows are staring back; under the rock is where the monsters lie. Pop another, Alex; now swallow. These drugs don’t help me; they work, yes, but make me worse. I am sinking further into this high, losing myself with every time capsule. A dilemma I hold within each hand and tongue, standing in the dark.

If I take each of these pills I will transform into what you are now, sitting behind your computer trying to be something you are not quite yet. I wish to be animal within this society, mirror you. But the downside to every pill, is the shadow to every light, I do not write. I would never regret this addiction but with every forbidden love at one point or another you must either love or leave before the poison from the black rose’s thorns take effect.

This idea of a better life is just too huge to gulp-away. Now a revolution on words! Observe how my pain leaps from this computer screen at you. Your eyes merely glimmer with the hope, but mine shimmer towards the slant of greatness.

I will not give up,

Tie me up in blood soaked ribbon,

A present for the entire world,

Beneath my skin it’s crippling,

With the major difference bestowed upon this simpleton,

My evil symptoms are different,

Time to kick-up a fuss,

Along with the kids with the kids of these kingdoms,

Stand tall beside my pillars are wisdom,

They are for show but should be feared,

One day at a time but it turns into years,

This is all I can wish for,

Now stand up, Alex; and wipe away your tears on your sleeve.

I am sorry I left you, I made the wrong choice, forgive my stupendous stupid ways. I won’t let you down, my prolific talent is fifty all anyone else’s out there, this time my dream comes first and I shall make sure life comes a close second. This is the begin of something so real to me, I am back revenge upon my pad, even if I have to write in blood; I will get my words to you!



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  1. Da FuNNIEST GURL evuuur



  2. helenaolwage

    Reblogged this on Dead & Buried.


  3. helenaolwage

    so emotional. I love your poems. You really do have a talent.


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